Failure is Not an Option

So I had an interview yesterday for an unfreakinbeliveable job yesterday. How cool is this job? This job is in the field that I would like to be working in (I.T.), it pays REALLY well, and it is a complete mess in the department right now, which means that I could wade into the thick of the mess and get my hands dirty right away. I always like a challenge. So it's a great job and it would really change things for the family, we could move to a small town, get a house, you get the idea.
So I had the interview and I blew it and I blew it bad. I really don't do very well it interviews (I'll take a battlefield over an interview any day) but this one was a train wreak. There was just so much riding on this interview that I just completely lost my mind. I knew most of the questions they were going to ask. They were the same questions that are always asked in interviews and the ones that were different I knew the answers to as well but I just could not articulate a clear answer. There were two-part questions and I would answer the first part (again, not very well) and then forget to answer the second part. I did open up and tell the panel that I was a total geek, which I am hardcore, but when I was given a chance you to totally geek out about projects I'm working on I froze. I guess I'm so used to people not understanding or not caring about such things that when I was given the chance to share it it almost seemed like a set up even though one of the interviewers (there were four) strayed a bit from the actual interview to ask me about a small music studio I'm working on. He seemed sincerely interested and I really wanted to share the details with him but my brain just stopped functioning. I'm surprised I got through the whole process without peeing in my pants.
I'm even surprised by how much this affected me. I've been in all sorts of situations that have required some strong guts, situations where very bads things could and did happen. Yet there I was sitting in a room with four very nice people and I felt as if I was on trial for murder and my life hung in the balance.
Now that I think about it, it may not be about me after all. Like I said, I've been in some nasty situations and it's never really been a problem but I only had myself to look after. Now that something has come along that could dramatically help my family I think that may make all the difference. Now that I have a family to care for everything is magnified. So if I get the job the excitement will be fourfold but so will the failure if I don't get it.
Anyway, the company wants to fill the position rather quickly so they will letting the person who gets the job know on Monday, Sept. 11. Is the date a good sign or a bad sign? We shall see. As soon as I find out anything I'll post it.